Getting On the “Write” Side of People—Writer’s Etiquette


Yes, I know that pun in the title was cheesy.  Getting on the “write” side of people?  Seriously…

But anyway, what does all that mean?

Today, I want to briefly share my thoughts about writing etiquette…meaning the way you approach other writers, particularly through the blogosphere.

A lot of the time, we are excited about our own ideas and writing endeavors.  And that is great.  We should be.  If we aren’t excited about what we’re writing, how can we expect others to be?  We think we have totally awesome, unique stories, with attractive, relatable characters, twisted villains, crazy relationships that work out in the end…and we want to share our joy with others.

It’s totally common.  Don’t ever beat yourself up for wanting to share and express your excitement for your own creativity.


That doesn’t mean you should be shoving yourself in other people’s faces.

tired squidward
When you constantly try to promote yourself…

Look, I get it, we all want to promote ourselves.  Heck, we would all like to be PAID for our ideas, our stories, our hard, written work.  Money is tight when it comes to writing, because you’re either a self-published author (like me), or your an aspiring author waiting for an agent or publisher to get back to you.

It seems like all of our problems will be solved if we simply earn ourselves a nice fat following.  The goal is to have an audience that is so in love with your book, they love it as much as you do.  But how do you go about OBTAINING this audience?

The Wrong Way

“Hi, I’m so-and-so.  I just wrote a book that I think you’ll love.  Would you mind following me so you can get all the updates on my story?  Thanks!”


The first time you see a comment or email like this, you might be like “Oh, sure!”  But by the tenth time or so, you’re like, “Seriously?” :/

To a degree, I think it’s always fair to give people a chance.  If they want you to check out their book, you might as well do it…give them points for reaching out.

But the problem is, it’s annoying, or even rude, when someone makes a comment on one of your posts that is COMPLETELY unrelated.  In fact, it’s sort of like someone being like:

“I found a new blog.  I’m going to pitch my book to them!”

The problem with this attitude is that it creates a sense of CONSUMERISM.  Everyone is out to get something, but no one wants to give.  No one cares about community.  It’s all about, “Hey, look at me!”

Everyone might be checking each other’s books out, but nobody will be SEEING.

The Right Way


If you have to pitch your book to someone, if you feel so inclined, be polite about it.  Seriously.  Validate the fact that you might be annoying them, that you aren’t trying to bother them.  Essentially, be human, not some promotional robot.

However, the best way to gain the audience you want and surround yourself with people that are interested in your ideas is to be a PART of that community you desire.

Nothing can be gained without something being given first.  You don’t have to watch Fullmetal Alchemist to believe that 😉

If you want an audience that’s crazy about you, find some people you are crazy about.  Find other bloggers who like the same things, read the same things, and are fighting for the same things.  I have discovered this by entering a community of aspiring writers…which, believe me, is a very big part of the blogosphere!

Become a part of a community.  Comment without wanting something in return.  Like a post without doing it to be noticed.  And follow people out of genuine interest.  What’s more, write about more than just yourself.  Promoting your ideas is great, but it can be annoying to see an endless stream of somebody else’s dream showing up in your inbox.

I hope this post wasn’t offensive to anybody, and I hope it helped enlighten some of you!  Thanks for being a great community!

Another subtle way to promote yourself is to do what I’m doing 🙂

I’d like to show you the cover of my book, and provide a link to where you can find it on Amazon (99 cents as an eBook, $12 as a gorgeous paperback):

Check it out, if you get the chance 🙂

22 thoughts on “Getting On the “Write” Side of People—Writer’s Etiquette”

  1. Yeah it grinds my gears when people will be like, “Great blog, also checkout my blog ….” out of nowhere. It’s like they didn’t grasp the point of the post. Don’t be afraid to offend people, though I completely understand where you’re coming from because I feel the same way. I strive to be in the middle ground in terms of opinions within a group, but its difficult. Cool artwork on your book, is this your first?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yeah! I get that all the time. It’s like I can tell when people actually AREN’T there for the sake of what I wrote…it bugs me. I’m glad that you feel the same way. But yes, it’s not always easy…
      Thanks! My friend did it, she actually has a blog too. And well this technically this ISN’T my first, I’ve just compiled the first four volumes of my series into one and given it a new name. The old series, The Golden Lands, needed a lot of remodeling, so I kind of made it into a “new” series. Some things have changed, lots of editing was done, you know how it goes…
      Are you writing a book too?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I’ve written a lot of first drafts to short stories but nothing has ever progressed from it. I found my passion for writing within the last year even though I always liked writing, it never sparked beforehand. Is your book a short story? What’s your friends blog?

        Liked by 2 people

      2. Hmm okay! Well, whether you’ve fully completed a story or not, I think it’s good that you’ve come to WordPress with your writing. It’s a good place to be.
        My book is actually a fantasy novel….it’s about 300 pages long.
        My friend’s blog is:
        She doesn’t post very often, because she’s always working on new artwork for people!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Thanks for this! There was a lot of invaluable advice. (Wait … suddenly I’m doubting myself … did I just call your advice without value? That is not what I meant …) (No, I’m sure that’s right …) (Or write …) (Sorry, couldn’t resist!)

    But yes, it really gets on my nerve when people comment on my blog: “Great post! Check out my blog now!” I’m like, “I’m not 100% you read this post … I don’t write great posts … mine are mediocre at best …” 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahaha!!! Goodness gracious! I loved trying to decipher that comment 😀 😀

      Yeah it bugs me too!! Haha, you are actually VERY funny!!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. So what I got out of this is that if you aren’t careful with self promotion, you just might end up losing your limbs or having your soul tethered to a suit of armor…not to mention the fact you might accidentally create a humunculus in the process. (Sorry, I saw the FMA reference, and my brain took a vacay for the rest of the article 😉 )
    All joking aside, a good article with good advice. I try not to leave links back to my stuff when I comment unless it is more than marginally related.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Haha, precisely!! That was brilliant 😉
      Thank you! I’m glad you liked it. And yeah, I guess you could say I’ve learned the hard way, because I used to be the idiot who did all of this stuff!


  4. Great post as always, Dominic! I love the reference to FMA’s theme of “equivalent trade”; I think that’s true in the real world too, there’s a give-and-take. 😀

    My blog is still a bit small to get those “Hi I love your blog please check out mine [link]” kind of people, but I’ve seen some of those on other blogs and I feel annoyed on their behalf. It’s like, if you’re not going to spend the effort to at least comment on something from the post, it doesn’t make me feel motivated to take the effort to visit yours. 😅

    This is slightly off-topic, but I’m not a fan of marketing; I’m the type of person who opts out of every marketing emails from stores and stuff, but if I receive a request to check out a book from someone I know well enough, I’ll do that. 😀
    Speaking of which, I also wanted to let you know I haven’t forgotten your book! I still haven’t gotten the Kindle version to show up in my Amazon, but I’m still trying every now and then. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha yes, FMA’s theme can be applied to so much!

      And yeah, you should enjoy it while you can, not having people bugging you!

      Aw well I’m glad that you’re trying. I don’t know if I’ve ever asked you this before, but if you don’t mind me asking, what country do you live in?

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Hmmm…okay. Maybe that’s the problem. It may be that my book is only on “Amazon US” or “Amazon UK”. If that’s the case, I’m not entirely sure what to do in order to help you :/
        Does the paperback version come up??

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I did see the paperback version every time I searched for the Kindle version! Though I’m sorry to say this isn’t a good time for me to buy paperback books because I’m planning a major move in a year or so. 😅
        I’ll keep trying every now and then; if it still doesn’t work, hope you’re patient enough to wait until I move. 😛

        Liked by 1 person

      3. Thanks for understanding, Dominic! 😀
        I managed to find out more about the issue, it seems everyone from my country can’t buy any Kindle book (or even get free ones) from Amazon, due to customs and some other limitations. 😅

        Liked by 1 person

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