We’re all just unhappy zombies. Not even just zombies. Unhappy ones.
We wake up. We shower (hopefully). We make our coffee. We go to work.
Life becomes an endless stream of going from one place to the next, of trying to save time, while understanding that we never had any in the first place. We spend so much time trying to get time, so that we can waste time in the way we want to.
Each passing day is a blur. Drive to work. Spend time serving people we don’t really even know. Putting on faces that are appropriate, but not real. We aren’t allowed show people who we really are. Half the truth is, we don’t even know who we are ourselves.
We spend countless hours trying to be happy, forgetting that, in our search for happiness, we never actually can attain it. At least not in the way we’ve been trying. Searching never made anyone happy. Only finding. Or better yet, accepting.
Money. Everybody needs it. Everybody wants it. It’s the one thing we try to get above so that we aren’t a slave to it, but it ends up enslaving us anyway. We try to break free of our chains by fastening them to our wrists. At least if it’s a choice to be slaves, we can say we were free enough to make such a decision. We say, “I don’t wanna let money control my life, so I better spend all my time trying to get it.” Hah. No wonder life makes no sense.
Pain. We hate it. We’ll choose the most difficult route if it doesn’t involve pain. We’ll sacrifice things for pleasure, even though sacrifice is supposed to involve pain. We pretend like we’re tough, but the moment the pleasure stops, the moment we get uncomfortable, we’re no better than infants. Life becomes unacceptable. Life becomes unfair. Sometimes, we think it isn’t even worth it.
I’m going through all this now as an adult. First thing I’m realizing is that being an adult sucks. Every child thinks about the freedom they’ll have as an adult. You can’t be controlled by other adults. You won’t have to ask for permission. You’ll be carefree, your own boss.
Lies. Kids are more free than we are. The older you get, the stronger the chains become. Welcome to adulthood.
“Everything can be set right, except death. And death sets everything right.”
-St. Josemaria Escriva