It’s difficult moving forward in life when you don’t know exactly where you want to go.
There are phases that we go through; times when you’re convinced of your convictions, and when beliefs seem to feel like the truth. But once these phases lose their luster and the part of you that was originally stone turns to sand…
…all that’s left is your hollow, formless body, driven by the wind.
There will always be decisions to make; we know that. And we can control what decisions we make. But we can never see the future or know whether or not our choices will make us happy. We can choose a path, but we don’t know where it leads. How can we choose when so much seems to hang in the balance?
In regards to phases, it seems fair to ask Which phases stayed the longest? Which phases keep reoccurring? Are these really not phases at all, but simply something that must be rekindled again and again?
I am in love with writing. I am in love with my girlfriend. I am in love with God and my faith. I am good at many, many things. I am a people person. I am a strong person. I am a weak person. I am a doubtful person. I am a realistic person. I am a hopeful person.
I need money. I need friends. I need God. I need love. I need security.
I want happiness. I want everything. I want to need nothing.
Who am I? Where am I going? What does God want from me?
What choices can I make that will fulfill all these longings?
College. Heh. That’s what it will do to you.
“What if my story isn’t good enough?”
“What if no one likes my idea?”
“Do I feel bored of my own idea?”
Have you ever had these doubts? Of course you have. If you’re a writer, then you’ve probably wrestled with these fears before, or you’re wrestling with them right now. We constantly fear being rejected, being forgotten, or seeing our hard work go to waste.
The truth is, writing a story is a lot like being in a relationship.
“What if he doesn’t like me”
“What if I’m not good enough for her?”
“Do I feel bored with my relationship?”
It’s crazy how similar writing is to a relationship. What’s important to remember, I think, is that, as in relationships, we have to PERSEVERE. I mean, if a relationship isn’t good for us or the other person, usually we stop, right? Hopefully we do. And the same goes with writing. If a “story relationship” REALLY isn’t working out, meaning you don’t feel captivated by your own story, or you are feeling like it isn’t worth it, then maybe it’s time to find a different story.
HOWEVER, it’s okay to just “not feel it” some days. That happens in real life relationships…but that doesn’t mean the relationship is bad. Bad days happen. Good days also happen too. And it’s important to remember that and, once again, PERSEVERE.
You’re never going to get what you want and be where you want to be in ANY kind of relationship unless you persevere.
Rekindle your imagination. Think of your favorite parts. Rewrite and reread. Fall in love again. Make plans. Take breaks. And, most importantly, be patient. Great writers don’t fall from the sky, so you probably won’t either!
Writing a story is like being in a relationship. What’s your relationship like?